Alyssa Kulesa

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On Saying No

When “No” Feels Like Torture

Saying no is sometimes difficult because we think that saying no now is saying no forever. So even though it may not feel good to say no in the moment, it feels worse to shun the idea forever so we end up saying yes. What loosens this thought trap is adopting the perspective some ideas aren’t a no, but they’re a not right now. “Not right now” is a no with room for it to turn into a yes later.

Bonus: When we have a place to store things we’re saying no to right now, and give ourselves a date to revisit them, it can be even easier to say no.

Ways to Say No

  • No
  • No, thank you
  • Not right now
  • I have other priorities right now.
  • I’m not willing to commit to that now.

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Written by Alyssa. Always has a red pen in her pocket. My story →

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