Hey Reader!
Life’s a great experiment. As much as we yearn for, seek, and contort ourselves to feel in control, control is an illusion.
As much as we’d like to control the behaviors of other people, we simply can’t and the sooner we recognize that the easier life becomes.
And that’s why my favorite reframe over the past two weeks has been, “take charge, not control.”
When we take charge, we realize that change is inevitable, but rather than being at the effect of the changes happening all around us, we make a choice to be at cause.
It’s the difference between thinking everything is happening to you versus it happening for you.
Seeking control looks like anxiously telling your partner, “We’re absolutely not going that way.”
Taking charge looks like, “Hey, I feel nervous about going that way. Let’s go this way instead.”
Or taking control can look like trying to control our feelings by saying something like, “I shouldn’t be angry about this” to ourselves and desperately trying not to let any ounce of that emotion seep out.
Instead, taking charge might look like, “Okay, I’m angry right now and I accept that. What is this reminding me of? Why is this triggering me?”
We don’t have to be at the effect of other people’s behaviors. Instead, if we take the time to recognize our own wants and desires, we can take charge and see more possibilities for alternative actions all around us.
Speaking of taking charge, I wasn’t loving how it felt to be in Facebook Groups as much any more but I absolutey adore 2-way interaction and building community.
So, rather than being at the effect of Facebook, I started us a community over on Telegram and I’d love for you to check it out. I’m sharing daily tips and tricks to help you flourish in life and business.
You can preview the channel and join our free community here.*
Take charge, not control.
Where are you totally taking charge in your life right now? What’s feeling out of control? Hit reply and let me know. Sometimes sharing these two things can help loosen it’s grip.
With so much love,
xx Alyssa
P.S. Come join us on Telegram for daily tips to help you flourish in life and business.
*Update: I took out the link because I closed this particular community since this email was sent.